No Snow?!?

Well, here it is the last day of November, and not a flake on the ground. We did have a light dusting that stuck around a few days, but that quickly melted the day before Thanksgiving, when it was 58 degrees outside! I took a break from cooking for Thanksgiving to take Michael to the playground. He had fun going down the slide and we rumpus-ed about on the soccer field playing tag. It's good it's been so dry and warm - a pleasant break from the endless wet.

We spent Thanksgiving at Grandma S.'s - wonderful to see close family and also those we only see every year or so. All the cousins are growing up so much - the teenagers and big kids handled a lot of the work, and it always amazes me how much gets done. It was especially fun to get to see our niece and hold her lots - she is awfully cute! Michael loves her very much and he has been missing her and all the cousins.

I finished knitting my "GAP-tastic" cowl - pattern on Ravelry. It turned out really well - first time doing a long-tail cast on (I only had to take it out 4 times because I didn't make my tail long enough). It's really soft and versatile - can be worn as a long scarf, or wrapped around a couple times, or can be worn over the head to protect that done-up hair (yeah right - when was the last time I did my hair up in anything but a ponytail...).

Michael wrote his name for the first time this week. He has been missing a letter here and there at times, but I'm fairly impressed given we haven't worked on it at all. We made a "mailbox" out of a shoe box, and have been sending each other "letters". Mom gave me a box of individual letters on little cards, so we pick out a few, put them in the mailbox, and then sound out the letters/word that arrived. Thank goodness for parents to help with this whole homeschooling endeavor - don't have much creativity, and certainly not confidence, so appreciate the tips we've been getting!

All of us are happy Advent is here. We got out our Advent wreath and Jesse tree ornaments again. It's been harder this year for Michael to understand the difference between Advent and Christmas. Nearly every house on our block had Christmas lights up and lit 1-2 weeks before Thanksgiving, all the radio stations are playing Christmas music, and the Christmas displays were up in some stores even before Halloween. I understand my rant is not unique, but it's much easier to understand the importance of certain seasons as an adult, rather than a child who is just excited for Christmas! So we've been emphasizing Advent even more than last year.

Languages

Whew... wheee whew, whew...

"Mom, I'm whistling in Spanish."

"Is that different from whistling in English?"

"Yes, it really is."

A Children's Book Day

63 chocolate chip oatmeal cookies

20 minutes of exercise

10 books read to one boy

9 minutes of time-out administered

8 students wanting to get out of paperwork the last week of class

7 minutes to unload the dishwasher

6 bills paid

5 ends tied in to finish my new knitted cowl

4 loads of laundry washed, dried, and folded

3 students' paperwork graded

2 reference letters written

1 haircut and 1 bath for 1 very cute boy

and.... 1 tired mommy.

Counting in Years by the Days

Waiting for a baby is never something I thought would be as great an issue as it has for us. It's been three years since my cycles returned after Michael was born and we started hoping for a new baby. I had so hoped that the waiting we went through before Michael would never return. I thought (silly me) that being pregnant would somehow "reset" my body and everything would be normal. Now it's been three years of waiting, much worse in length and frustration, than the first time. We didn't know then what we know now, that Michael is more than likely a miracle and for all we know, we could have empty arms and the numbers would be more like six years.

Years... it seems foreign to say "years" in relation to something so personal - my own life, my own deepest longings. One hears stories of friends of friends who "tried for seven years", or "they waited for ten years and then gave up". I fear becoming a story of years, although to some extent our three years feels like a story in and of itself already. The first year of watchful and hopeful waiting, the second year of frustration and tears, the third year of surgeries and endless letters and forms from the lab to the clinic to the hospital and back. I don't want there to be a fourth year, but yet I know that now that we've been set on this course we will continue to follow it until the Good Lord says.

Some months are more hope-filled than others. We're trying a new pill, or we just prayed a Novena, or things just feel better this month. Some months it's harder to let go and trust, others it's a throw-up-your-hands and let's see what next month brings. I simply find it hard to believe it's been three years of a day-at-a-time. I'm still afraid of what is to come. What if these things don't work and after our year of doing what the doctors say we decide to move forward again? What if we seek adoption and that part of our life is counted in years as well? How many years of a day-at-a-time is necessary to purify my desires and my heart? It's so hard to not "what-if" and think ahead to all the possibilities, and much of the fear comes from those things. It's such a mysterious process - why does a Baptism at Mass bring so much anger into my heart, when another baby smiling at me during the same Mass bring me comfort? Trying to understand it brings more demons, sometimes, than allowing oneself to not understand.

"My son, if you come forward to serve the Lord, prepare yourself for temptation.

Set your heart right and be steadfast, and do not be hasty in time of calamity.

Cleave to him and do not depart, that you may be honored at the end of your life.

Accept whatever is brought upon you, and in changes that humble you, be patient.

For gold is tested in the fire, and acceptable men in the furnace of humilitation.

Trust in him, and he will help you; make your ways straight, and hope in him."

-Sirach 2:1-6

Fall Photos

Here are some pictures of what we have been doing this fall. Matt was pretty busy a few weeks ago catching up on extensions and quarterlies. Michael has been sticking to his "homeschooling" almost every day, even if it does mean endless rounds of "War" (he always wins) and "Go Fish" (he usually wins that, too). I'm finally caught up on grading papers and doing midterm evals. I really need to get cracking on my independent project for school, but seem to have papers or other projects due each time I try get organized. On the other hand, I've been more determined to not let the school monster take over this semester, so have been trying to balance it out and do more things with Michael and Matt.

Matching hats for Matt and Michael. Same pattern, but red for Michael and fisherman's wool for Matt. My boys will have warm heads this winter!

All Saint's Day party with the homeschool group. It was so much fun! Michael was St. Michael the Archangel (see below). His costume got a little heavy, so most of it came off by the time he started playing the games. Each family brought at least one game for the kids (saints) to play. This one was clever (all of them were) - try to shoot the hockey puck through the "narrow gate"!

The saints - super creative, and really fun to try to guess who each child was dressed up as.

Michael's wings. I was just going to cut a shape out of tagboard and glue some felt over the cut-out to make them soft. Michael's godmother came to spend some of the afternoon with us, so I enlisted her help. She is so creative, and helped me design this awesome pair of angelic wings. She had the idea to cut "feathers" out of the felt, and then glue cotton in the middle.

St. Michael the Archangel

How did "You can read one book to yourself before you go to sleep" turn into "Please read every single book on your bookshelf before you go to sleep"?!?

Pumpkin carving. Michael was able to be more involved this year.

Yes, they are using chisels to carve the pumpkins. My boys take this very seriously.

"Fondor" and "Doc". Matt and Michael named them.

My Octopus carrot. The carrots I planted and my family tended all summer turned out great. I froze 20 quarts plus have large bags in the fridge, and quite a few more at Mom's house.

Pumpkin Patch

A friend invited us to go to a pumpkin patch with her and her children a few weeks ago. The weather was lovely - sunshine and just the right amount of crispness in the air. We avoided the "scary" things and spent most of our time watching the kids play on the playset and toys. They had a corn maze, hay ride (but wasn't running the day we went), Tennesse fainting goats (what is a fainting goat? They didn't fall over while we were watching them!), and of course plenty of pumpkins. We did get one big pumpkin for carving.

Michael spent a lot of time on the John Deere tractor. He was a bit cranky that day and ended up getting time out on a hay bale for not sharing with the smaller kids.

Michael and Mom by a big pumpkin hay bale. The JD tractor had to be in the picture.

Michael and Kathleen. (He told me he is going to marry her.)

Michael and the girls. They had fun being together. Michael still misses them a lot after our move, and we greatly enjoy the times we get to see them.