Spring Photos

I finally cleaned photos off my phone and found a few that are fun to share. Life keeps rolling along and is full of blessings.

 4-H: Communication Arts, County. He put together a PowerPoint presentation on how to make a stop motion video as well as showed the video he and Dad made over Christmas vacation. Plus a photobomber. 

 April Fool's. The Boy. He got up early in the morning just to do it. I'm so proud of him.

 "Fancy Nancy" (anyone else's little girls love these books? I'm not crazy about encouraging this, but she loves reading these books, so we'll try to balance it out with Ramona and Amelia Bedelia and other good role models.)

 Toddler bed! Big Brother introduced her to the idea of reading books in the adapted bed, which habit then had to be broken after some bedtime naughtiness.

 It snowed 6 inches at the end of April. We took a couple hours off school and went sledding because we could. 

 Mass

 T-shirt chromatography. Fun! (of course, anything that involves super-indelible-never-come-off-even-until-you're-dead-and-maybe-even-later markers would be [ala Robert Munsch])

 Car wash, AKA good way to get kids out of the house on a warm day. 

 Bowling. Our area bowling alley is doing the "Kids Bowl Free" program (which should be renamed "Kids Bowl Reduced Price, because it's not really free - but we'll still take it) and it's been fun!

 Father's Day - flying kites with Dad, and Mom failing to get anything off the ground.

 More Father's Day - helping Dad make Sunday lunch waffles. 

Goodbye favorite shoes. I'll miss you.

Still Here

I can't keep up with everything, and blogging is easy to push to the side. It's a nice way to journal and share a bit, but seriously, who has time for that?

It's been a year. Not as crazy as the 2010-2013 Years of Ick, but this one gets an honorable mention. After feeling progressively worse and worse, despite telling myself to buck up, that it was nothing, I caved and contacted PPVI in Nomaha last summer (my new name for this town, because every time it comes to mind, I reflexively wail, "Nooooooo!"). Then began the 12 months of misunderstanding. It's a long story that doesn't need to be rehashed, for the sake of my adrenals. I tell myself I didn't wake up one day and simply decide to become a bad patient, but was forced into it. Others may have a different take on this, and the truth probably lies somewhere in the middle. Suffice to say, it was what happens when over-educated nurse meets old-school doctor meets antiquated paper charts meets anxiety meets distance medicine meets overworked specialists meets stubbornness (all around). I have now learned to adjust my expectations that nothing will go smoothly whenever I send an email or make a phone call and leave a message or ask a question - it just is what it is. Knowing that it won't helps - a little. What to name 2016-2017? I have some ideas (a few unprintable).

Anyways, I racked up two more surgeries in my new quest to better understand my patients (didn't set out to do this, it happened). Bye-bye giant fibroid, bye-bye adhesions, hello new meds and "brain consultant". Thanks to my recently acquired anxiety, the surgeries were super-fun to prepare for, but thankfully all the worst case scenarios didn't materialize. But I'm a bad patient - impatient, stubborn, fretful. Is it the German thing, or the oldest girl thing, or what is it that makes me so very much detest needing help? It has been humbling to need to rely on my family for emotional stability and family and friends for the more day-to-day stuff of help with children and housework. But also a blessing in disguise: as these physical and mental things have come to a head, it's been good to realize how vulnerable we all are, present company included, and how much we need to connect and rely on one another. It's been hard to admit that I'm not OK, but in a way, relieving.

Forced rest aside, it has been really good to have more time with the kids. Certain days have been a little hairy - fighting aplenty and not enough preventive discipline to go around. And just plain tired of being tired. Yet even in these days am finding the grace to be grateful for the gifts and to roll up the sleeves and get into the mess of raising children, being a wife, and trying to walk the path. And then there are days like today when The Boy woke me up with breakfast in bed and sat down to work on fair projects and math, and Baby Girl happily did "math" next to him with calculator and a giant pile of pencils. Almost halfway through the 6 weeks of required inactivity, and things keep improving, so looking forward to having some of the summer left to do more gardening, bike rides, and being able to lift my own daughter onto the swings at the park. (Seriously, with all these medical advances, how can we not finding a way to all surgeries without lifting restrictions for mothers?!?)

 They didn't miss us too much while we were gone! He wanted to keep this slithery friend for a pet and was disappointed when I said no, but it all worked out alright - he changed his mind when it regurgitated frog legs and then escaped from the bucket.

 On the way to fishing and park time!

 He caught a fish!

 First post-op outing to the botanical gardens. They had a Lego exhibit, along with the gorgeous flowers. Was so good to get out and walk, and even better, among beautiful things.

Photo that doesn't quite do justice to the breakfast-in-bed feast. He was so sweet and anticipated everything, reassuring me that it was really just "plain milk" in the sour cream container.

So, while I'm really, really hoping that this is the end of medical crap for a good long time (for some reason, the surgeon didn't take my suggestion to "just put in a zipper this time, already"). But, in the meantime, praise God for my beautiful children, husband, family, good friends, and an abundance of love and prayers.

Not-so Subliminal Gospel

"A woman of Samaria came to draw water. Jesus said to her, 'Give me a drink.'"

BabE (whispering): "Mom, Mom, I need water."
Me: "Shhhhh!"

"If you knew the gift of God and who is saying to you, 'Give me a drink,' you would have asked him and he would have given you living water."

BabE (pulling on my shirt): "I'm thiiiiiiiirsty. I need a drink."
Me: "Shhhhhhh!"

"Sir, give me this water, so that I may not be thirsty or have to keep coming here to draw water."

BabE (no longer whispering, now quite loud): "GIVE ME A DRINK!"
Me: Thanks, Saint John.

Patron Saint of...

Once again have lost my blogging steam. Do y'all really want to see and hear about what happens around here? It's pretty boring - laundry, grading, yelling at kindly requesting kids to do their schoolwork, pleading with kids to do their schoolwork, incentivizing kids to do their schoolwork, cleaning, making meals, doing piles of dishes, finding shoes for growing feet and pants for growing legs, going to the library, going to the grocery store,  going to meetings, reading Robert Munsch books over and over and over and over and over and over and over, bathing kids, trying to lovingly correct misbehavior, tucking in, re-tucking in, getting up, ironing, more grading, responding to and writing endless e-mails, wading through piles of paper, paying bills, getting everyone to church, saying prayers (with frequent clenched teeth interjections [because God won't hear it if you clench your teeth and growl it] of "leave your brother alone!", "don't touch your sister!").

It's a good life - it really is. It's not a remarkable life (I'm fine with that). The other day I was putting away paper (I'm always putting away paper. My purgatory will be piles of bills, things shoved aside "to do something with later", half-finished drawings, and "precious" millions of half-scribbled coloring pages) and came across source documents for my publication from several years ago. Perfect honesty - for a moment I entertained a question if I'd taken a wrong turn somewhere. I have a rather diverse reading audience, and to both sides, it would look like I've sold out. I've declined opportunities to advance in a career to spend time with my kids. And I don't spend 100% of every day with my kids because I keep discerning God's nudge to do this mission, despite the fatigue and ensuing grumpiness. This is old news to anyone who knows me just a little. It's my ad-nauseam schema - feeling squished in the middle of diametric worlds.

The other day I heard a radio host asking people who they would want to be patron saints of, given the opportunity to fulfill their personal calls to holiness. While the chances of my canonization wouldn't be worth a big Vegas wager, it's still worth a shot, and I think I've got it figured out: Saint SK, patron saint of grumpy-worn-out-cussin'-but-trying-not-to/frumpy-but-trying-to-look-ok/inhospitable-but-trying-to-get-along-with-others/workaholic-but-trying-to-relax/impatient-but-really-love-their-kids/politically-orphaned/sugar-loving-but-trying-to-eat-spinach/coulda-woulda-shoulda/always-questioning-rarely-trusting/working-schlub-but-wacko-religious-radical ladies. So there you have it - when I get to Heaven (after my purgatory of piled-high paper), I'll be praying for all you wrecks!

(In the meantime, I'd suggest asking a real saint to help you out. Saint Gianna Beretta Molla comes highly recommended, especially if you want a saint friend who doesn't forget about you even when you forget about them.)

Our Strange Family

2016 was a good year. Not a great year, but it did. Once again, we have had so much for which to be grateful. We also offered a lot of heart-felt prayers for many around us struggling with problems and grief, and some for ourselves, too.

As mentioned a few times, DH is our resident photographer. When I look back through the photos I have taken, I'm struck by how odd we seem. But I'm cool with that - been odd for a long time, so why change? Here's a little of the oddity from fall and early winter.

Meet Jango Pett, our pet ladybug. The kids named it after Jango Fett (I think it comes from Star Wars, but might be from Lego, super heroes, Bionicle or Hero Factory, or heaven knows what). It flew around our house for a few days in the fall and every time they could catch it they carried it around and crooned to it. Oh my.

We made Plague Doctor masks for our history lesson on the Black Death in Europe in the Middle Ages (it was one of the suggested activities in the History book, really). It was just kind of creepy all around and I think The Boy is still scarred. Good news - we still like History a lot. Bad news - running out of steam when it comes to doing the activities. (I need a personal assistant to go to Hobby Lobby and/or grocery store and/or hardware store every week for me...)

 All Saints Day party costume: St. Mark. I actually bought a pattern and fabric and sewed it (that's the odd part of this picture). I sewed the very first seam so incorrectly I was about ready to burn the whole pile, but persevered - just don't look closely.

All Saints Day party costume 2: Aslan, and/or St. Mark's lion. This one was a lot easier - lion hat from a previous gag gift, and $1 Goodwill lion suit, and a quick suede fringe tail (seriously, who makes a lion costume without a tail?). She was the one who decided she was going to be Aslan - no joke.

Hangin' out with Pope Francis. She was MOST enthusiastic about going to Cat. Chat at the conference this fall. Highlight for the grown-ups was the Audrey Assad concert. Lowest point - panic attack when the small one tries to squeeze between bleacher bars for a 10 foot drop.

Personal design of an AT-TE. He spends hours every week trying to build sets he sees in catalogs and games. It's tragic to him that he cannot buy every single Lego set he has ever wanted, but turns out he has a lot of pieces, so that helps heal the wounds just a little.

Penguins. I absolutely love penguins. Silver lining in medical travel (blech).

Making a sledding hill in the front yard - poor little flat-land children! We are having a real winter this year - lots of snow, blizzards, subzero air temps, double-digit subzero wind chills. The kids are quite thrilled with the amount of snow. Every time it snows we pile more snow onto our snow forts and they are getting to be fairly epic. Only problem is we built them just a little far apart, but there's plenty of war zone in between for brave snowball ice chunk throwers.